One of the biggest questions my clients ask during wedding planning is "which of my vendors are expecting a tip, and how much am I supposed to give them?". A good general rule of thumb is that if someone owns the business, you are not expected to tip them. Tips are generally expected when it's a vendor who does not work for themselves and is being paid a wage by their boss. Having said that, a good wedding vendor typically puts a lot of behind the scenes work into your big day that you may or may not be aware of, and showing gratitude is something that is ALWAYS appreciated. As a planner who owns my own business, I never expect a tip at the end of the night. While it does happen from time to time, and of course a gratuity is always a very generous surprise, I've also been thrilled to receive a beautiful thank you card, a small gift, a glowing review or referral, of even just a very heartfelt thank you that shows how appreciative my clients are of the work I've done for them. Here's a list of the main wedding vendors and what is considered 'standard', but numbers are approximate, and can of course be tailored based on what's approporiate for your specific situation, budget and the service that was provided.
Shared with permission from www.whensparksflyevents.com
There are many different options for serving alcohol at your wedding, and there are pros and cons to each. While traditional etiquette states that every wedding should be an open bar / host bar, sometimes this is simply not within your budget. It’s important to talk to your venue to find out what your options are and consider which is the best for your wedding.
Host / Consumption bar vs Open bar
Many people are confused about the difference between a host bar (also called a consumption bar) and an open bar:
- A host bar is when guests are able to order whatever drinks they want, and at the end of the evening the bartenders will add up the cost and bill you accordingly.
- An open bar is when you pay a per-person fee ahead of time, and then your guests are able to drink as much as they want. When a venue offers an open bar option, they will generally give you a standard price or a premium price - this is in reference to the type of liquor they will be providing, either typical bar rail or top-shelf.
Which is right for you? Well, this largely depends on how much you think your guests are going to drink. For example, let’s say that the venue is going to charge you $40 per head at your wedding. If drinks each cost $10, that means you are paying for 4 drinks per person. If you think that on average your guests are likely to drink more than this, the open bar is the way to go. However, if you know that a large number of your guests will not be drinking, or you don’t anticipate that most people will have 4 drinks, you may want to go with a host bar instead.
So, if these options are outside of your budget, what do you do?
- Cash bar: guests pay for all drinks themselves
- Ensure this is indicated on the invitation so guests know to bring case
- See if the venue has an ATM nearby
- Limited bar: Provide a host / open bar but only for certain drinks, typically beer and wine
- Some will also include a “Signature drink” in this bar
- Typically other drinks will be available as well for guests to purchase
- Cocktail hour: Provide a host / open bar during cocktail hour only
- You can also combine this with wine on the tables or a champagne toast
- Wine on the tables : Provide wine during dinner only
- Champagne toast: Provide a glass of champagne for each of your guests
- Create a limit: Have a host / open bar up until a budget limit or only during certain hours
- Remember that this means that at some point during the evening, the bar is going to switch from open bar to cash bar, often coming as a shock to your guests
- Drink tickets: Give each guest a coupon for a drink on you
- Send these with the invitations or provide them only to your close family and bridal party
- Toonie bar: Each drink costs $2, and you pay the remainder of the cost
- This can be a great option as it still gives guests a tangible reminder that they are purchasing a drink, making them less likely to leave half empty drinks around the room and get new ones, while still heavily discounting the cost for your guests
- Daytime wedding: Guests are far less likely to over-consume alcohol if your wedding is earlier in the day. Consider an afternoon or brunch reception
- Bring your own: Some venues will allow you to create your own bar
- Keep in mind that you will likely also need servers, as well as a liquor licens
- Make sure you don’t run out! Order more than you need - you can return extras later
A couple of other notes:
- If people are consuming alcohol, it’s a good idea to have some food available. A late night buffet is a great option for this!
- Don’t forget about non-alcoholic drinks! Some venues will charge $5 or more even for non-alcoholic drinks. You may be able to purchase a “non-alcoholic open bar” by paying a per-person rate for unlimited pop / water / juice.
No matter what bar option you choose, don't forget to make sure there is a way for people to get home safely. Call taxis, use responsible choice, or offer a room block at a nearby hotel.